If you want peace, you don’t talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies. –Desmond Tutu

How many times have you said “I don’t talk about … race, politics, religion, you know, all the hard stuff?” I’ve notice that when someone says that what they really mean is “I won’t talk about that with you.” We’ll talk all day with someone we agree with, won’t we?

We do this to avoid conflict. We may think that the “other side” won’t listen or will be insulting or angry. But not talking does nothing to resolve our differences or bring us closer together.

I learned several years ago that conversation between people of differing beliefs, backgrounds and opinions can still be civil. I had an unlikely conversation with someone I thought was much different than me. We simply shared our thoughts without judgement. Nothing really changed we still held our very different beliefs, but neither of us saw the other as “the enemy.”

As long as we take sides and blame others for all the bad stuff in the world nothing will change. If we really want peace, we have to start talking to those we see as enemies.